Can You Help Me Get Rid of Just One Label?

“Your son has Autism Spectrum Disorder.”

 

I remember feeling dizzy, the ground under me was shaken.

 

It felt like somebody had hit me on the head with a hammer.

 

“It can’t be!” were the first words out of my mouth.

 

Years of grief and coping with the effects of ASD followed. Years of trying to make Mohit the normal person that he wasn’t… trying to fit him into a box that was too tiny for his amazing self.

 

Today when I look at him, I see him as just ‘Mohit’: my son who has a whacky sense of humor, is incredibly handsome, and is a talented artist.

 

Can I share something with you? The label of ASD no longer hangs heavily over our family’s head.

 

Why didn’t I let it go earlier? I should have felt this light heartedness years ago.

 

Letting go of the Autism Label

 

Imagine how it would be if you recognized the uniqueness of your child.

 

This beautiful bundle of joy who is delightful to look at. This beautiful child who learns differently from other children, just because his brain is wired differently.

 

Your child has his own strengths.

 

He could be a visual learner, who enjoys looking at words or numbers.

 

He could enjoy lining up cars, and know about every make and model available.

 

He could know about entire fleets of aircraft.

 

He could be musically inclined and pick every wrong note you sing.

 

Or he may be a talented artist.

 

Most importantly, your child has an abundance of unconditional love which he wants to give you.

 

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But, he may also have his own set of difficulties.

 

He could become overwhelmed with sounds and crowds.

 

He could have difficulties with communication.

 

He could process things differently.

 

But only because he has a differently wired brain.

 

Can the Future Be Different?

 

Let’s project a little bit into the future.

 

What if your child turned out to be like Dr. Stephen Shore or Dr. Temple Grandin?

 

Yes, both these individuals had a hellish time initially. But they overcame all odds to be the unique people that they are.

 

What about others like Carly Flieschmann who types her thoughts out?

 

She broke out of the label of autism spectrum disorder, and look how people responded!

 

 

Amazing isn’t it?

 

And others like Weston Schmier?

 

“I want you to say that I am in the business of helping people discover their true divine self!

 

This encompasses a whole variety of techniques, which range from working with them at night, taking people back to clear things, and energetic healings (sic)…

 

I also help them to shape a future, which will enable them to do service that will allow them to work through their hearts.”

 

Weston Schmier, at age 13 (Waiting for Weston, by Marilu Schmier, Pg 220)

 

Your child could be any of the people mentioned above, if you let him.

 

What stops you from letting go of your fear? Why does the label hang heavily over your head? Why is it limiting?

 

Are you afraid of your child being different and not like others? That’s not a bad thing.

 

Often the feeling of fear is worse than the actual experience. It’s time to let the fear go.

 

If only we did this, the world would be a better place.

 

Imagine a world where differences were accepted and there was a place for everyone to fit in.

 

I can’t say it better than John Lennon.

 

 

Is there something called ‘normal’? Who defines the parameters of ‘normal?’

 

All these years I wanted to a puja that would be offered in gratitude of Mohit becoming normal.

 

But I’m about to take the plunge.

 

Next month is Mohit’s 27th birthday. I will do a puja to celebrate him being his unique self.

 

What you are going to do to celebrate your child’s uniqueness?

 

“I did not speak but I still had a voice. They took my voice and made it their own. From early on was their grim prophecies. They said I was in my own world so they created a world for me, a world of isolation and limits on opportunity. They subjected me to countless drills. They called me ‘special’ but I came to know that simply meant I was not to have what they have unless I conformed. As I struggled with my sensitivity to that around me they decided to label me as deviant.

 

My ways being misunderstood subjected me to whispers and stares and often my parents were berated for having such an ‘unruly’ child. I was told there is an epidemic, an epidemic of persons like me.

 

But I survived, I proved the prophecies wrong, I saw the only epidemic was one of ignorance. I broke free and found my voice, a voice in unison with others from it had been stolen. I embraced my world, for my world though often literal, is one of radical authenticity, a world I find safe and into which I invite any to enter and actually see.”

 

Dan L. Edmunds, Ed.D – Being Autistic

 

I have not heard a more powerful statement. Have you?

 

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2 COMMENTS

  • Vishal says:

    Thank you for showing us everything that autism is, but is not visible to us, Kamini. It truly makes us look at autism through a different lens.

    • Thank you for the kind words, Vishal.
      I believe that these amazing people will teach us a lot more.
      All it requires is awareness and persistence.
      Have a lovely day.

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The Importance of a Parent Training Program
For Individuals on the Autism Spectrum

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