My brother’s friend’s wife divorced him after 10 years of marriage. She fell in love with her hair stylist and felt the need to move on. There was a 5 year old child in the picture too. An animated discussion on the topic followed amongst my family members. My mom immediately said, “It’s a very wrong thing to do.” My brother said that he told his friend that he should have been more vigilant. Maybe something was amiss in their marriage. My sister in law was of the view that ‘people can fall in and out of love anytime’. My husband, ever astute and thoughtful, dissected it from different angles. Eventually, he tilted towards the little child and said that all of this was unfair on him. My concern was the child too. However, I could not find it in my heart to blame anyone. Things happen.
Some questions arose in my mind as a result of this discussion. And they kept me up all night. “Is there a right or a wrong in such a situation?” I thought. “Do we know the facts? Do we know the people concerned well enough? And above all – is it our place to comment on such issues?”
None of us like to think of ourselves as judgmental. But we are, and that’s a fact!
Okay, not all of us. There are wonderful people like Mohit, my son, who are not part of this category. In fact, these people emanate unconditional love and acceptance.
Mohit is a young adult on the Autism Spectrum. What you experience while interacting with Mohit and others like him is love as pure as freshly driven snow. Love without expectation. I could be feeling terrible about something. But if I go and pour my heart out to him, I feel loved and accepted. No conditions, no judgement.
Many others have affirmed that they have felt the same thing. It makes me happy to know that I am not alone and more people are recognizing this strength of autistic individuals. Interact with individuals on the spectrum and you will agree that they don’t judge others.
However, these differently abled people are the first to be judged. Isn’t that ironic? Strange are the ways of Mother Nature.
I have seen students being stared at if they engage in anything out of the ordinary. People ask weird and demeaning questions about their actions and communication. If the child throws a ‘temper tantrum’, people will drop everything to come and view the tamasha.
Earlier, this would make my blood curdle. Now I just pity those individuals who will never understand the meaning of higher existence.
Can we achieve this state of non-judgmentalism and imparting pure love? Of course!
Without words, here are 3 ways in which autistic individuals show us how to simplify life and walk on the path of love.
What arises from all the 3 points above is unconditional love and acceptance which is the exact opposite of being judgemental.
And it moves you out of the zone of fear and into the zone of love.
My son lives in a realm of love. I want to move in with him. Would you like to join us? Making the transition from my realm of fear to his realm of love is going to be an arduous journey. It will be a journey that will push me out of my comfort zone and stretch my limits.
I am now determined to implement the steps above to get to this beautiful place of love, acceptance and non judgementalism.
Have you started your journey towards love? What were your victories and challenges? Do share your experiences with me. I would love to hear from you.
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Some genuinely excellent blog posts on this website , appreciate it for contribution.
Keep this going please, great job!
Very eloquently written, I could relate to this
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