Instead of bombarding him with questions, she would voice an open ended sentence and… Pause.
More often than not, Sameer would connect with her by sharing a smile or filling in a sentence.
There wasn’t any force or coercion on Sameer to answer immediately.
She gave him time.
Under the sweet blanket of acceptance and lack of stress, Sameer blossomed to connect and communicate with her.
Once she changed herself, Sameer also started to change.
Celebrating the little wins
Celebrate the small things, because they’re actually the big things.
Sameer has become pretty adaptable.
Taking him on long trips is no longer an issue.
When Seema’s mother recently visited, the family was able to take her to tourist destinations in the US.
Sameer enjoyed those trips too. He was the well behaved, good natured child in the family!
Recently his class teacher sent a note saying,
“I wanted you to know that Sameer has been integrating into the general education 3rd grade in the afternoons for a Read Aloud group. The teacher reads a chapter from a book and all the students sit on the carpet and listen to her.
Sameer has been sitting so quietly and appropriately for the entire duration of the Read Aloud (20 minutes). I am so impressed with his behavior.”
Every day, the family says a prayer of gratitude.
They celebrate each victory of his.
Showing up, after every fall
Sometimes things don’t work the way we want them too.
A few months ago, Seema was worried about Sameer’s expressive language.
He’s a beautiful brilliant boy who loves words and pictures.
So we used multi modalities for him to converse.
No pressure. He could write if he wanted, he could type or he could speak.
That led to reduction of stress. And sure enough, the expressive language picked up.
Persistence is the name of the game.
The view from my eyes is different.
It spells T-R-A-N-S-F-O-R-M-A-T-I-O-N
Transformation happened in the mother. This was followed by transformation in the child.
It’s not about fixing the child. It’s about addressing core issues. This involves first building a relationship then constructing communication based on that.
And it’s about taking responsibility.
For two decades and a half, the prescribed treatment for autism has been – special ed, speech therapy and occupation therapy.
Yes, these are all good. But building the relationship between mother and child lies at the core.
If we don’t address that, we’re missing the foundation.
Once a back and forth in this crucial relationship is established, it will positively impact other relationships in the child’s life. Then speech will become meaningful and behaviours will be regulated.
It starts with you- the mother.
You were meant to be empowered.
Find the power within you.
Then decide what works best for your child.
“Look to your right… It is the path back home. If you choose, you can take it. It is safe, easy, and comfortable. You do not have to work out or fight or do anything else you do not want to…
Or you can keep moving forward. I will not lie to you. I cannot predict what may become of you. It will require a lot of training, hard work, study, and danger. But in the very end, you will know strength. I swear it. You might just become someone who will make a difference in the world.”